The Big Screentime Mum Challenge
The change in how we live and communicate
How does screentime impact your child’s development
Tips on how to manage from experts and other Mum’s.
Globally our world changed when the home television became an average consumer product in the 1970s.
Suddenly the way we interacted with one another changed and social gatherings were no longer just about talking and face-to-face engagements. It didn’t take long for each home to have a TV set, and instead of kids running around in the neighbourhood playing as the sun set, they were inevitably sitting in a circle around a television watching something together.
Fast forward 50 years and almost every human on our planet has some form of the electronic device in their hand almost permanently; streaming, playing, working, and engaging on social media. As adults, we spend almost our entire day on some sort of electronic device, from the moment our alarm sounds in the morning until we go to bed at night.
As much as this has become the norm for adults, there has been a similar trickle-down effect on our children. You put a tablet in a three-year old’s hands, and they know how to navigate the menu of children’s games to find their favourite and kick off a play session.
Younger tweens and teens are using electronic devices in the classroom, to do homework, research, write reports etc. And then once the “work” is finished they use their devices to relax by playing games or engaging with friends online.
It’s no wonder that overall studies have shown that the average time spent on screens is seven to ten hours. Add in eight hours of sleep (recommended for adults) and ten-twelve hours (for young children and teens), and suddenly you realise that there are almost no hours in the day left where we are not engaged electronically.
What is the effect on our toddlers and how can we find a good middle ground?
The American Academy of Pediatrics recently released study findings which include recommendations for an acceptable amount of screen time:
No screen time for children under 2
One hour per day for children 2 to 12
Two hours per day for teens and adults
These seem like completely unattainable goals for the average run-off-their-feet parent. How on earth can we limit ourselves and our toddlers to such extremely reduced amounts of screen time? After all, it has become so easy to place a toddler in front of a screen in order to get tasks done around the house while your child is engaged with the screen. Gosh, I don’t know how I would have coped with a three-year-old while demand feeding a newborn had it not been for screen time! And we soothe ourselves by thinking that whatever they are engaging with is “educational” or “developmental” means the amount of time spent engaging with it is justified.
Let’s look at the “bad” stuff – what the scientists have to say about our toddlers and screen time, and then we can investigate the “good” stuff – how to move forward in a way that allows screen time but in the appropriate way.
Decades of research on screen time has revealed associations with both positive and negative developmental outcomes (see below). But the evidence is far from conclusive and more research into the effects of screen time on children is needed. This mixed evidence base has led to unclear and contradictory recommendations around screen time for children.
The difficulty is that what constitutes ‘screen time is constantly changing. That’s because newer technologies like tablets, smartphones and apps create different demands on the developing mind than television.
Brain scientists who study the impact of screens on baby brains don’t have all the answers yet, but what they do know will help parents understand how critical it is to provide off-screen experiences. Only then will children learn, improve their social and cognitive skills and be healthier and happier in the future.
Babies learn the most from human interaction
Patricia Kuhl is one of the world’s leading brain scientists and runs experiments with more than 4,000 babies each year. “What we’ve discovered is that babies, under a year old, do not learn from a machine,” she says, pointing to several brain scans on a computer. “Even if you show them captivating videos, the difference in learning is extraordinary. You get genius learning from a live human being, and you get zero learning from a machine.”
Screens hijack attention spans: For children to be successful, they need to learn how to concentrate and focus. That ability starts to develop during their earliest years when their brains are more sensitive to the environments around them. For a brain to develop and grow, it needs essential stimuli from the outside world. More importantly, they need time to process those stimuli. While reading storybooks out loud gives children time to process words, images and voices, the constant absorption of on-screen images and messages affects their attention span and focus.
Screens curtail the ability to control impulses: Young children need their dose of boredom. It teaches them how to cope with frustration and control their impulses. If young children are constantly being stimulated by screens, they forget how to rely on themselves or others for entertainment. This leads to frustration and hinders imagination and motivation.
Screens reduce empathy: Research has shown that screen time inhibits young children’s ability to read faces and learn social skills, two key factors needed to develop empathy. Face-to-face interactions are the only way young children learn to understand non-verbal cues and interpret them.
“Until babies develop language,” says Charles Nelson, a Harvard neuroscientist who studies the impact of neglect on children’s brains, “all communication is non-verbal, so they depend heavily on looking at a face and deriving meaning from that face. Is this person happy with me, or are they upset at me?” That two-way interaction between children and adult caregivers is critically important for brain development.
Exposure to screens reduces babies’ ability to read human emotions and control their frustration. It also detracts from activities that help boost their brain power, like playing and interacting with other children. But if you must rely on screens at certain moments, just make sure to control the quality of what they see and engage with them while they’re watching. The benefits of limiting and even eliminating screen time in these early moments will last a lifetime.
Yet it’s becoming clearer that children establish their activity and screen time habits early on. So, it is an important topic for parents and early-year practitioners to be mindful of.
Are there any benefits?
High-quality TV programmes and apps aim to help toddlers with their language development, shape and colour recognition, numeracy and literacy. They also aim to promote problem-solving, visual thinking and imagination. Educational apps are those that help toddlers learn these things in active, engaging, meaningful and socially interactive ways.
Babies and toddlers learn when adults interact with them alongside screen time. Here are some screen time tips! If parents choose wisely, apps could benefit children under five by fostering play and creativity.
Age-appropriate screen content and activities might also encourage development. For example, there’s an association between toddlers using interactive touchscreens earlier and them being able to make small, controlled movements – stacking blocks – earlier.
What appears to be important is having age-appropriate content and context (where and who with) for how the screens are used.
By allowing appropriate access to technology, we’re encouraging children to learn important digital skills they’ll need throughout their lives and careers.
Alrighty then so, the most important thing your child needs is ENGAGEMENT. They can have a little screen time, but it is important that you are there with them and engaging. Also, many experts say that watching passively isn’t the best thing for under twos. Your involvement, at any age, is important.
You could try asking them questions. For example, try asking about what happened in the programme, what their favourite part was and what the characters were wearing.
“I try to talk about what’s on-screen as my daughter’s watching. We also sing and dance to YouTube videos as that’s fun to do together,” says mum Emily.
Reality: I’m still going to have my kid on a screen unsupervised for a random amount of time because I’m not supermum.
But hey, don’t feel bad, you’re not alone. And here are some real-world tips on how to try and limit the amount of time your young one spends glued to a screen:
This is one mum’s recommendation; and although they have older children, I think the tips are a solid start to a positive experience:
“In my house there are two teenagers and a 7-year-old, all girls, and whilst we certainly don’t get it right all the time, we’re not in bad shape:
The use of tech is positively encouraged
I try to encourage focusing on specific activities, such as finding new recipes, researching home learning projects, keeping up to date with current affairs, finding best buys and checking out hairstyles and new makeup techniques
Mealtimes are definitely media free, but we will often share funny video clips or favourite songs during after dinner chats
Tech is discouraged from all bedrooms (this is an ongoing discussion though!)
Tech is also discouraged for an hour or so before bedtime and we try to have a quiet time for reading, crafts or just chatting”
I like their premise that tech in the house is a reality and a positive thing. The tip about mealtimes being tech free is important. Children eating mindlessly while watching a screen means that they are unaware of what they are eating and how much – both extremely bad habits that can lead to obesity later in life.
Finally, let’s look at some basic small changes we can make in our households that will decrease our and our children’s screen time and increase our levels of engagement:
1. Be realistic.
If your kids are spending a lot of leisure time on screens, including watching TV, start by setting smaller, more attainable goals. Instead of jumping right to the recommended one to two hours or less per day, start by cutting their current screen time in half. Remember the adage about everything in moderation. Try as a family to set limits for how much screen time you’re comfortable with your child having and stick to it. Don’t forget to include your own screen use (including mobile phones) in the discussion as you will set an example to your children.
You’ll also want to keep an eye on the total amount of screen time – it can quickly add up without you realizing. Especially if your toddler is watching TV for 30 minutes here and there and using a tablet at other times during the day.
If you’re not sure whether your family is using screens appropriately or might want to cut down, you’re probably not alone in this. You could try asking yourself whether screen time in your household:
is controlled
interferes with what your family wants to do
affects with sleep
affects the control of snacking.
2. Be accountable.
Set expectations with your kids and set goals to be intentional about reducing screen time.
3. Be engaged.
After school or work, spend time each day talking face to face with kids and give them your full attention. Having mealtimes together in particular have been proven to cultivate healthy parent-child relationships and to reinforce long term healthy habits in children. Children who eat as part of a family meal are more likely to perform well at school, have healthy relationships with friends and their parents and are less likely to get into trouble at school.
4. Put hand-held devices away.
During screen-free hours, put devices away or at a charging station in a common area so they're not attracting your kids' attention.
5. Create phone-free zones in the home.
Making family meal areas a phone-free zone is an easy way to start. Or keeping devices out of the personal spaces like bedrooms and the bathroom.
6. Go outside.
Putting down the phone and taking a walk or playing outdoors increases your endorphins and provides that feeling of happiness in your brain, boosting your mood and improving your physical health. Again, just taking the time to go for a walk with your toddler will have a tremendously positive effect on their sleep and overall wellbeing – and yours!
7. Getting the right content
Try to make sure the content is appropriate for your child’s age. Check independent review sites that list TV shows by viewer age and educational value.
You’ll also want to choose apps carefully. Some apps that were specifically designed for toddlers open up the opportunities for play and creativity rather than being a passive experience.
8. Screens in the mix
Try to see screen time as just one activity out of lots of other fun options. Think of all the other fun you could both have – making a den out of sheets, playing inside boxes, baking together, trying craft activities or going on playdates.
Also, the general advice is for toddlers to be active for three hours a day. So, try to make sure they’re getting plenty of exercise and play.
9. It’s how you use it
As well as the length of time, think about how using a screen fits into your child's life. You could use it during long car journeys, for example. We know this is easier said than done though. Especially if you have a fractious toddler shouting ‘tablet’ at the top of their voice.
10. Avoid use at meals and bedtimes
Most experts agree that screen time should be avoided at mealtimes so your child can interact and learn good eating habits. Family mealtimes are a marker for wellbeing in children and young people.
Similarly, try to steer clear of screens close to bedtime.
Written by Ria Brink, Prothesist and Orthodontist and mum of two
